by Ann Van De Water
1.My friends have kids my own kids’ age and can impart all kinds of wisdom like what kind of underwear their children find to be the comfiest and how they get their children to eat a lunch that is only partly chemically enhanced.
2. I feel much better about my spending habits on my children, knowing my friends also tell their children to put their new items of clothing in their rooms and show their Dad another time (like maybe never).
3. Friends say things like, “You look like you’ve lost weight.” “No?’ “Your butt looks smaller. I was walking up to school behind you and I noticed your butt looks smaller.” And you take it for the compliment it truly is, while humming “Whose got a big old butt?”
4. Friends notice when you’re sporting a new outfit or haircut and tell you how great it looks. (And when you were young and foolish, you imagined these would be the kinds of things your husband would notice! Boy were you wrong!)
5. Friends are the people with whom you can share your housecleaning tips, like how to clean up before hosting a party. “You run around the house and put stuff you don’t know what to do with in boxes and laundry baskets in the garage?” “I do that too, but I also shove stuff under tables and beds.” “That’s nothing! I put completely random stuff in garbage bags and just throw them out!”
6. They can tell you which exits on car trips have clean restrooms. ( Men never notice these things as they are not as observant about bathrooms, possibly because they do not need to use the bathroom every hour but can go 8 hours or more.)
7. The friends you’ve had since grade school remember things like how you used to decorate each other’s lockers to celebrate a friend’s birthday and then use your student I.D. card to cut a birthday cake one of you had made and brought to school and you laugh so hard when you are reading their emails that you snort Diet Coke up your nose.
8. You can see your friends and chat with them many times a day: school drop off and pick up, grocery store, coffee, gym, soccer, etc. and still need to email them because you forgot to tell them something.
9. Some friends are like the sisters you have but they live nearby instead of across the country. Some sisters are like friends with whom you were lucky enough to grow up together in the same house. Some friends are like the sisters you never had.